do it yourself FREEDOM

Impacts: Mind, Health, Home, Work, Money, Community, Time

“As the soil, however rich it may be, cannot be productive without cultivation, so the mind without culture can never produce good fruit.” – Seneca

We all need time to relax and rest our minds. We also must have opportunities to play and challenge ourselves physically and mentally. These recreational activities are often fulfilled by what is more accurately defined as entertainment in our modern culture. Things like television, movies, video games, the internet, listening to music, and the use of intoxicants often serve as the mechanisms for facilitating modern entertainment; and this is a problem.

The problem is that when we choose activities that give us little opportunity for personal growth we are using our time unwisely. If we were to choose activities that exercise the mind and/or body while we are relaxing or having fun we begin earn back time to live quality lives. We also give ourselves the opportunity to grow and/or improve our health. Every time we spend our time being proactive and productive we move closer to realizing more personal freedom.

Take Action

• Read instead of watching television.
• Play music instead of listening to music.
• Write or read online instead of just surfing or gaming.
• Avoid intoxicants.

Impacts: Mind, Work, Money, Community, Time

“A wise man will make more opportunities than he finds.” – Francis Bacon

“When the pupil is ready to learn, a teacher will appear.” – Zen proverb

I’m a true believer in the idea that we make our own opportunities. But I’d also say that opportunities expand at an exponential rate. The inverse is also true; when opportunities are sparse creating new opportunities is extremely difficult.

This is why you hear those of us who have achieved a certain level of success saying things like you make your own opportunities. What you don’t hear most successful people say is that it is really hard to get started, but you’ll hear everyone say that if you persevere you will succeed and anything is possible. This is most definitely true, getting started is the hardest part.

Another simple truth is that opportunities come from connections with other people. They don’t come out of thin air. Building quality authentic relationships with other people is the secret sauce to creating opportunities. Also keep in mind that the number of connections is secondary to the quality of relationships. You can also think of it like this, it’s not how many people you know but who you know.

Now that particular idea might leave a bad taste in your mouth because it sounds like how the good-old-boys-club works and in fact it is how their club works. But it works for them because it can work for everyone. The community you build around yourself will the source of the opportunities you make. If you choose to get and MBA and climb the ladders in the corporate world the opportunities you make will come from those people higher on the ladders. If you choose to connect with other groups of people you will make a different set of opportunities.

Take Action

• Spend more time with more people online and in person.
• Build friendships and relationships on trust.
• Be loyal.
• Be authentic and honest.
• Be yourself.
• Carefully think through your thoughts and put them out there.
• Always listen to new ideas and remain open.

Impacts: Mind, Community

“Freedom is a fragile thing and is never more than one generation away from extinction. It is not ours by inheritance; it must be fought for and defended constantly by each generation, for it comes only once to a people. Those who have known freedom, and then lost it, have never known it again.” – Ronald Reagan

“The ballot is stronger than the bullet.” – Abraham Lincoln

“You are not only responsible for what you say, but also for what you do not say.” – Martin Luther

Participating in democracy, your community, and all relationships with other people and even the environment that surrounds you protects your freedom. Ideally it means you take time to consider all choices before you vote with a ballot, choice or action. Subscribing to a political party or belief system is our natural tendency but allowing these affiliations to divide us and tell us how to choose can cause serious trouble. But it’s not easy to always be engaged and aware. Most of us just don’t have the time to stay informed on all the issues and we often end up relying on TV news sound bites. In politics its also really easy to just fall into the blue state and red state role.

We each have a vested interest in moving our communities in the right direction and although our individual votes and impacts may seem almost valueless, each little bit adds up. Any small step you can make toward increasing your awareness of the issues moves us all toward a better world.

Take Action

• Stay informed on political and community issues.
• Learn about the people irregardless of their affiliations.
• Vote by ballot.
• Vote with your wallet.
• Stay informed on the decisions your elected representatives make on your behalf. A complete list is available on USA.gov.

Impacts: Mind, Health, Home

“I put my heart and my soul into my work, and have lost my mind in the process.” – Vincent Van Gogh

The feeling of accomplishment is probably one of the most important pieces of increasing confidence and happiness. There is almost nothing like it. Taking a step back and admiring your own work might on the outside seem a little selfish but it can be one of the more rewarding feelings we can have.

For some people making something might be as abstract as a poem, or watching their child graduate from college. For others it could be literally building a piece of furniture, or growing a lush garden. It almost doesn’t matter if you’ve done it for yourself and it’s something you love doing.

When I was in high school I discovered pottery. In fact I became such a good potter I decided to try to make a living making pots in my twenties. The one thing I learned about myself is that the act of making things itself was the most important part. The physical finished object was only interesting to me for as long as it took for me to decide if it was good or not.

When I started making pots to sell a little bit of that good feeling died because I was making things I hoped other people would buy and I started to focus on only on it’s value to other people. Now in my forties, one of my personal goals is to have time enough again to make pots, but this time I want to do it completely for myself. I don’t want to have to rob myself of the feeling of accomplishment to support myself. I also personally think it’s worth the time spent wedging the clay, at the wheel, and tending the kiln, because it’s what I like to do. It makes me happy.

Making something for yourself is about giving yourself the permission to spend time doing something you like and that gives you the greatest feeling of accomplishment. Don’t put extra requirements on yourself like it has to be a work of art, or that other people have to like it. Just make it for yourself. After all it’s your feeling of accomplishment, not theirs.

Take Action

• Anyone can make stuff. Make something for yourselfwithout the intention of showing it to anyone else.
• Try making gifts instead of buying them.

Impacts: Mind, Health, Home, Work, Money, Community, Time

“The money you have gives you freedom; the money you pursue enslaves you.” – Jean Jacques Rousseau

“The Lord commonly gives riches to foolish people, to whom he gives nothing else.” – Martin Luther

“Every man is rich or poor according to the proportion between his desires and his enjoyments.” – Samuel Johnson

This one is really hard to achieve because we learn to consume at a very early age. Need and want are sometimes inseparable in our minds when it comes to how things make us feel about ourselves. Sometimes the desire for something is so overwhelming we become obsessed by it and we often don’t stop to discover why, we just work blindly to achieve it.

When I was a kid my family went for a day hike one weekend. When we got back my brothers and I noticed a little blue sports car parked next to our van that had not been there before. I asked my older brother what it was and he said it was a Porsche. From that day on I wanted one so bad it hurt. I know that sounds stupid but I had got bitten early by the sports car bug.

As I grew up an obsession grew and on a regular basis I’d browse the car classifieds in the newspaper and in time online, constantly imagining the car I’d buy someday. A few times I scraped together enough money to buy a used Porsche but talked myself into waiting for a better car. Over the years I spent a lot of time thinking and dreaming about the day I’d drive it home.

Finally when I was 38 I bought one. It was used but seemed to be in very good condition. But the day I drove it home it broke down. The dealer paid for the tow and repair so there was little financial damage but the experience sent a powerful wake up call into my head. Sitting on the side of the highway in a dead Porsche waiting for a tow truck helped a bit too. After a few months I sold it.

Looking back I realize that I learned an important lesson and the money I lost almost seemed worth it. Inside me there must have been some unmet need I was certain this car would fulfill. One thing is for sure, my crazy obsession had taken on a life of its own and most definitely distracted me from making progress in other areas. On the bright side at least I learned this important lesson before turning 40. This has given me few more useful years to refocus on the things that really matter. It’s also opened me up to looking at all my consumer desires with a different set of eyes.

I suspect that understanding deeply buried desires is probably the hardest thing for any of us to do. Wanting less or at least understanding why we want so much can unburden us in many ways. In my case I wasted a lot of time, energy, and money on a car that in the end proved to be more dream than car. Had I gotten a grip, and gotten over it sooner, I could have made a lot of progress on other more productive things. Although its arguable that until we learn this lesson the hard way we have to continue living the mistakes. That may be true of a lot of things.

In any event, at least for me, wanting less has become one of the most freeing decisions I’ve made. It continues to be a daily challenge but it pays me back dividends in time with my family and time for the things I like doing.

Exercise

• Make a short list of the things you want most. For this exercise limit this list to tangible things.
• Sort the list from most important to least important.
• Next to each item put an approximate number of years you’ve wanted it as a point of reference.
• Start with the least important things and write down why you want it.
• Move your way up the list.
• The goal is simply to open your eyes. Don’t try to talk yourself out of wanting these things, simply try to understand why you really want them.
• Once you begin to uncover your real unmet needs try fulfilling them in ways that don’t include obtaining things.