The Back Story
“One’s philosophy is not best expressed in words; it is expressed in the choices one makes. In the long run, we shape our lives and we shape ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And, the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
“No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.”- Buddha
Most advice intends to solve a problem. Bad advice tends to distract you from the real problem and merely attempts to treat symptoms. Some good advice arrives at the wrong time. I hope the simple ideas presented here find their way to you at the right time and show you how to cut past the symptoms lying on the surface and help you treat the real underlying issues.
The summer of 2007 was the right time for me to stumble on this simple way of looking at things. I’m not exactly what combination of events lead up to the brief moment of clarity that sparked this book and so many positive changes in my life. It could have been a number of things, my looming 40th birthday, frustration with the war in Iraq, climbing fuel prices, my job, or even the evaporation of my home’s equity. It almost doesn’t matter; catalysts can come from almost anywhere and the net effect is always the same, change.
I can remember the exact instant I came to my senses. I was sitting in my truck, stuck in traffic, headed to my office in San Francisco one hundred miles from home. I realized that there was one simple thing I could do to solve all my problems. In a nutshell, I could make different choices.
Like most people I often blamed outside forces for many of my troubles. Some external forces are unavoidable but many we create ourselves. By focusing on the things we can control we can make real progress. Blaming things other than ourselves is an easy way to avoid the truth. When I applied this solution to the things that worried me most I instantly realized I wasn’t helpless. I could immediately begin moving my life in the right direction simply by making different choices.
I know this might sound a bit dimwitted at first but when you stop and think about it we choose our own paths. If we’re proactive and thoughtful we tend to make better choices. The real trick is to convince ourselves that blaming external forces outside our control doesn’t help. Making better choices is the main thing that drives us forward.
I then began to brainstorm big and little things I could do that would make immediate positive impacts on my life. Big life changes take time and require careful planning. Little life changes are quick and provide instant benefits. I also realized that if my choices impacted the world around me negatively they would ultimately impact me negatively so I kept a win-win requirement in mind as I brainstormed. In other words each choice had to be a win for me and a win for the world around me.
I ended up with a fairly long list by the time I got home that night. Now a year later I’ve gotten them all together in a form easily digestible by you. I’ll be posting them here regularly and then once I have them all together I’ll publish them in a printed book through Lulu.com.
